What can make a good parent?
A great parent is someone who strives to make choices in the best interest of the kid.
What makes a fantastic parent isn't just defined by the parent 's actions, but additionally their intention.
A great parent doesn't need to be perfect. Nobody is perfect. No kid is perfect either … keeping this in your mind is important when we set the expectations of ours.
Successful parenting is not about achieving perfection. Though it doesn't mean that we should not work towards that goal. Set high standards for ourselves then and first our children next. We function as important role models for them.
Top 10 Parenting Tips
You will be a much better parent, in case you follow these 10 strategies for parenting tips, and you'll avoid bad parenting.
Some are not simple or quick.
It's unlikely that anybody is able to do them on a regular basis.
Although you might not absolutely do all of these things, however, the tips in this parenting guide can help you move in the right direction.
#1 BE A good Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Do not simply tell the child of yours everything you wish them to do.
The most effective way to teach is to show them.
Human is a special species in part because we can learn by imitation. We are programmed to copy others' actions, comprehend them, and integrate them in to our personal. Children, particularly, watch everything the parents of theirs do very thoroughly.
Thus, be the person you want the child of yours to be - respect your kid, demonstrate to them good behavior and attitude, have empathy towards your kid's emotion - and your kid will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show Through ACTION
Demonstrate the love of yours.
There's simply no such thing as loving your child too much. Loving them cannot spoil them.
Only what you choose to do (or give) in the title of love may - things like material indulgence, leniency, low expectation, and over-protection. When these items are provided in place of real love, that's when you will have a spoiled kid.
Loving your child may be as simple as giving them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and also hearing your child's problems seriously.
Showing these actions of love is able to trigger the release of feel good hormones like oxytocin. These neurochemicals can provide us a deep feeling of contentment, emotional warmth, and calm; from these, the child, will acquire resilience and never to point out a closer relationship with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Infants are born with around 100 billion brain cells (neurons) with relatively few connections. These connections create the thoughts of ours, drive our actions, shape our personalities, and essentially determine who we are. They're "sculpted", strengthened, and created through life experiences.
Give your child positive family interaction, particularly in the early years. They'll then be able to see positive experiences themselves and provide them to others.
But if you give your child bad experiences, they won't have the kind of development needed for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Have a tickle marathon. Go to the park. Laugh with the child of yours. Give them good attention. Ride with an emotional tantrum with them. Solve a problem together with an optimistic attitude.
These positive experiences produce excellent neural connections in your child's brain and create the memories of you your child carries for life.
When it comes to discipline, it appears to be hard to remain positive, particularly when dealing with behavior issues. But it is possible by utilizing positive discipline and avoiding strong discipline.
Being a great parent means you need to teach your child the morals of what's right and what is wrong.
Setting limits and being consistent will be the golden rule to good discipline. Be firm and kind when you set rules and implement them. Focus on the reason behind the child's misbehavior. And allow it to be an opportunity for them to learn for the future in a good manner, rather than to get punished for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR The CHILD of yours
Tey letting your child know that you will remain there for them by being responsive to your child's signals and sensitive to the needs of theirs. Support and accept the child of yours as an individual. Be a warm and safe place for the child of yours to explore from and go back to.
Kids raised by parents who are consistently responsive tend to have much better psychological regulation development, interpersonal skills development, and mental health outcomes.
#5: Talk with YOUR CHILD And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Many of us know already the value of communication. Talk to your child and also listen to them carefully. By keeping an open line of communication, you'll have a much better connection with your child and your child may come for you when there is a problem.
But there's another reason for communication. You help your child integrate different parts of their brain, a crucial process in a kid's development.
Integration is akin to the body of ours, in which various organs should coordinate and work together to have a trully healthy body. When different regions of the brain are integrated, they can work harmoniously as an entire, which means fewer tantrums, much more good behavior, much more empathy, and much better psychological well-being.
To accomplish that, conversation through troubling experiences. Ask the child of yours to explain what happened and the way they felt developing attuned communication.
You don't have to provide solutions. You don't need to have all of the answers to become a good parent. Just listening to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using simple words are going to help them make sense of the experiences of theirs and integrate the memories of theirs.
#6: Reflect on Your own CHILDHOOD
Many of us want to parent differently from the parents of ours. Even people who had an excellent upbringing and a happy childhood may want to alter several aspects of how they had been brought up.
But really often, when we open our mouths, we speak the same as the own parents of ours did.
Reflecting on the own childhood of ours is a step towards understanding why we parent how we do. Make note of things you would like changing and think of how you'd get it done differently in a genuine scenario. Try to be mindful and change the behavior of yours next time those issues come up.
Don't quit in case you don't succeed at first. It will take practice, lots of practice to consciously change one 's child-rearing strategies.
#7: Focus on Your own WELL-BEING
Parents require relief also.
Pay attention to your own well-being to avoid parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things such as your own needs or maybe the overall health of your marriage are placed on the back burner when a kid is born. If you do not pay attention to them, they will become bigger issues down the road. Take time to enhance the relationship of yours with your spouse.
Stressed-out parents tend to be more prone to fighting. Do not be afraid to request parenting assistance. To have some "me time" for self care and stress management is crucial to revitalize the mind.
How parents take proper care of their child mentally and physically will make an impact in their parenting and family life. In case these two areas fail, your child is going to suffer, too.
#8: Don't SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
Undoubtedly, for some parents, spanking can result in short-term compliance which occasionally is a much needed relief for the parents.
Nevertheless, this method doesn't teach the child right from wrong. It simply teaches the child to fear external consequences. The kid is then motivated to stay away from getting caught with inappropriate behavior.
Spanking your child is modeling to your kid that he/she can resolve issues by violence. A child who is spanked, smacked, or maybe hit is more prone to fighting along with other children. They're more likely in order to become bullies and also to use verbal/physical aggression to resolve disputes.
Later in life, they're additionally more likely to lead to delinquency and oppositional behavior, worse parent child human relationships, mental health issues, and domestic violence victims or even abusers.
You will find a variety of better alternatives to discipline which have been shown to be much more effective, such as positive discipline (Tip #3 above positive reinforcement and).
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What's your goal in raising a child?
If you are like the majority of parents, you would like the child of yours to do well in school, be productive, be responsible and independent, be respectful, enjoy good associations along with you and some, be to care and compassionate, plus have a happy, healthy and fulfilling life.
But how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
If you're like the majority of parents, you most likely spend the majority of the time simply attempting getting through the day. As authors, Bryson and Siegel, point out in the book of theirs, The Whole Brain kid, rather than helping your kid thrive, spent most of time just trying to survive!
To not let the survival mode dominate your life, next time you feel angry or frustrated, step back. Think about what anger and frustration can do for you or the child of yours.
Rather, look for ways to switch each negative experience into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums can be turned into invaluable brain sculpting moments in case you concentrate on teaching the child of yours, not trying to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT By utilizing Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I don't mean shortchanging your child with tricks. What I mean is taking advantage of what's currently known by scientists.
Parenting is one of the most researched fields in psychology. Lots of parenting strategies, traditions, or practices have been scientifically researched, verified, refined, or refuted.
For best parenting advice for raising a kid and info that are backed by science, https://parentinghowto.com/ here's one of my favorite science based parenting guides, The Science of Parenting.
Using scientific knowledge is of course not really a one-size-fits-all approach. Every child differs. Quite possibly within the very best parenting style, there can be a variety of good parenting practices you can choose based on your child's temperament.
A good example is using spanking to discipline. You will find many better alternatives, e.g. redirection, reasoning, time-in, etc. You are able to choose a non-punitive discipline method that works ideal for your child.
Of course, you are able to also decide to utilize "traditional" or "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or maybe spanking) and might still buy a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has shown us that children with various temperaments react to the quality of parenting differently.
Those people who are more susceptible to parenting quality will have better outcomes under great parenting but worse outcomes under poor parenting.
Those who are much less susceptible may "turn out fine" regardless of how tough their parents treat them. Though it doesn't imply those practices are good. These children are merely lucky. They could thrive despite bad parenting, not due to it.
Why take a chance with sub par parenting practices when you can use well-researched, better ones?
The importance of parenting can't be underestimated. Taking science-based parental advice might not be the easiest way to parent. It might require much more work on your part in the temporary but can save you lots of time and agony in the long run.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The great point is, that although parenting is hard, it's also very rewarding. The bad part will be the rewards usually come much later than the effort. But if we try our best today, we will ultimately reap the rewards and also have nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!